Friday 22 October 2010

my blog is dying

My blog is sick, and it seems it will die soon.
My notebooks are revolting over it, also my audio recorder.

I don't even feel like reading blogs, even those interest me..
I would like to have a time machine different from internet..

My house?

I thought once that internet is freedom
Now I think it gave me a free time, without free space.

I've been recently realizing that having a blog made people think they have the right to ask any question in mind, and have the right to feel anything towards a certain blogger.

I realized also that it made some family members understand me better, but still

I feel that pain of a student in her first day in school, in the last one..

I am lost in this inter net, I want to leave, I have no time to meet Oz but I would love to visit the wicked witch of the west in Apollo Victoria Theatre.

Leaving the internet in this time of history is like wearing a burqa'a_ although the burqa'a has a similar quality of internet like having an intimate relationship with a screen.

The internet also took off the spark from Queen Grimhilde and her marvellous Mirror, and changes the genre of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs from fables to science fiction.

Looking back to my sentences... how possessive I am, associating all those verbs to myself.

Verbs do not deserve to be possessed.

Poff!

12 comments:

Mohammad Al-Yousifi said...

am sick:(

The Simper said...

tweet ;)

Anonymous said...

it seems like whatever it is , you have been only trying to maintain it in order to avoid the drastic change u ought to make ,and the internet was just a temporary drug , an illusion of motion .

P.s. i apologize if this counts as

"...people think they have the right to ask any question in mind, and have the right to feel anything ..."

Safeed said...

يبدء الشغف كبيرا، وينتهي بلا أثر
هكذا هي المدونات، بالنسبة لي شخصيا، ما تصورته تخلصا من عبء ما تحول هو بذاته إلى عبء أكبر

Deema said...

ma6goog,
your posts are more attractive on paper I'd think..

-
The Simper,
I tried it last year, but didn't like it and closed my account..

I would like it more if people were tweeting less

-
Anonymous,
I don't know what would be considered a drastic change in my life, but I am realizing now that the internet is not the instrument.

about your p.s. I am considered among those people, and I would post -if it happens to be a subject of apology- an apology.

-
Safeed,
الشغف رحالة جوال لا يمكن أن يهدأ أو ينتهي

و المدونات هي أماكن لا وسائل، لذلك ممكن أن تهجرها إلى أماكن أخرى، فهي ليست كاليد التي تأكل بها

أما العبء فهو لابد ينفرج

Hamad said...

Hello Deema =)

I've always seen blogs as a place to share thoughts, whereas the more intellectual the thought is, the higher the value of the blog that thought was written on.

Your blog is nowhere near dead... atleast not to me...

Compared to the thousands of mindless blogs out there that seem very much alive, I find yours to be amongst the few that are truly worthy of note.

Of course, I am not trying to get you to see reason or anything like that, nor am I trying to get you to keep posting. I am merely stating that your blog is very much alive in comparison to all else! ^_^

If reality is for those who lack imagination, then I'd trust you to design a grand reality, engineered in words and verbs, possessed only by that which is infinite.

Perhaps your conflict is with purpose?

Awakenings said...

This is a very positive step in the right direction.

one of the most exhausing things in the world is to act like a sponge absorbing peoples emotions wether its of an admiration, anger, sadness, frustration, happiness or even criticism.

when we are about to shut one door surely many other doors will start openning up.

The best thing about these decisions is that they are potentially reversable. So its not the end of the world :)

This is a new challenge will surely spice up your life once again.

لسان العا قل وراء قلبه وقلب الأحمق وراء لسانه

Jewaira said...

Is this some uncontainable contagion that has crept into our blogs?

It is some ennui, part opening the windows and letting the sunshine in, and part letting go of the mould we cast for ourselves.

Jewaira said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Someday said...

I read this on my google reader
since I have loads and loads to read somehow I assumed this was written by an other girl whom I knew and it made a perfect sense knowing all what she has been through recently
so today as I've missed you and walked in to my surprise this was yours, different reasons leading to the same conclusion
I don't know what I'm trying to say, I can't tell days apart, at one moment I stepped out just one step back and looked at the bigger picture to find out the noise of details was blinding, I've been looking for a thread to hold on to, can't drown back in the details or over look what I've seen, and as I write this, I wonder how selfish I am, I would love to help you, your blog, the star that shines on the darkest of nights, but with deep sorrow I'm incapable to help my own

Deema said...

Hamad,
Thank you... Dying is a period of transformation ... I kust need to leave a place .. I can only leave this place...

Juwaira,
I need the sunshine in so badly...

Someday,
I don't know .... Alla kareem .. I am not sad though i am just busy in a different way perhaps..

Deema said...

Awakenings,
Yeah i will see what will come to my life instead :-)